This road leads to Kona

Yesterday was a troublesome day, many things to do and a lot of anxiety. The morning started with the rain pouring outside. Strong rain means heavy traffic and this means taking longer to get to any place you want to reach... I got anxious... and while worrying about having everything done I just remembered that when you want something to be done, you must face challenges right in the face and follow through... and this led me to triathlon trainning - I was complainning about my weight (no, I'm not heavy weight, I'm just too tin that if I loose a songle pound it can make a big "harm" over my health), and about being disorganized... Well... I just realized that if I wanna reach Kona I must stop looking at the missing points of my schedule and remember my so-called motto "there is the ideal world and the real world, you must work to reach the ideal and deal with what's real"... and that made me finish the day with my to do list done and a new schedule...
tomorrow, updates on my trainning (just fyi: the first trainning day started with cold and rain... and I took it as a message: if you want it, you must take it as it comes...)

As I told, I'm working as a self employeed at a small business owned by a couple of friends. The good side is that you can learn a lot about letting things go when you just need focus on getting things done.
The chat chatting at the coffee corner just doesn't exist and so does the "my boss is a jerk" motto. It's a good enviroment... lots of problems, but lots of "good will" too... But the fact is I wasn't noticing that.. til yesterday noon when I heard about the a complaint free world campaign. I got hooked up. Can ou imagine just spend one single day without any complaints... Well, the challenge is a bit higher: 21 days (the estimated time to form a new habit) with complainning... a huge challenge... we are humans after all, and being so we get use to... COMPLAINNING...
well, let's get to the point: to be in a complaint-free enviroment is a bliss... and I would like to take this concept to my next job... and in finding out how blissfull is not to hear anyone complainning I decided to get a few bracelets and start the challenge (I haven't got the bracelets yet, even so, I will start today with "practicing")...

And if you got the idea right, go to www.acomplaintfreeworld.org and get your bracelets...
I'll tell you (honestly) if I fill my 21 days..

see ya

Yesterday was somehow a stressful day... but the best thing was that I could figure out which were the possible colateral damages and working hard to avoid them. I was't totally successful, but I did better than usual, so I must be proud of myself... just one day after another.. one step a time... and at the end of it all I'll be alright.


(ps. I'm not the kind of person addicted to astrology or the other kinds of "predictive sciences" but I'm enjoying a book about my sign... not very proud of my unfavorable aspects, but you konow, in order to get better you first need to face reality... AS IT IS!).


see ya

Tk you all for the support during these tough times!

It’s been a really long time since my last post. Lots of things happened, my life got very messy and it was quite difficult to see “a light at the end of the tunnel”.
Now, looking back time it’s funy to see how the dots just connected. I’ll try to make a brief of the last year –

I’ve gotten a promotion.
6 months later, I lost my job.

So what happened meanwhile?

My boy friend broke up with me. And it happened in such a hard way, that I just still can’t find words to describe.
I was undone. I was totally devasted.And I was so hurt that I started to act in such an impetuos way that the only thing I can say to explain is - I was insanelly trying to figure out how to ride away from pain.
Now, 1 year later I can see that the all process started long before and what happened was mostly due to my lack of self steem.

Now someone may ask how can an athelete and accomplished person lack of self steem, how it starts, how does it works and the most important: how it led you to almost destroy everything you’ve worked so hard to build.

Well... I don’t have the answers. I must say that for now I’m just happy to figure out how my mind is working, how I’m sabotaging myself and what kind of “glasses” I’m using to see the world (remember Buda: “ we create our own reality”).

And now, one year later I’m ready to start over. I think maybe it will take a bit longer to get to Kona – I still have to find a job, to pay my debts, go back studying and mend a broken wing. For now I’m just weight lifting (I lost about 6 kg, and once I was already thin, I’ve gotten in a dangerous zone – I’m now 44 kg, for 1,68 m height – which means that my IMC is the same of a starving somalian.). This week I hope I can get back swimming and at the end of the week I hope I can go back running. I have lots of things besides sports I would like to share during this recovery time. I think t will be an interesting time, worth living. So welcome to my journey back to life.