This road leads to Kona

Went to the cardiologist and took a blood test - I'm just waiting for the results. In about two weeks I'm scheduled to a VO2max test... I'm curious! Yesterday, after a day fighting back some "negative" thoughts I went to see a counsellor again, just to figure out what to do with myself.. I'm still striving with sorrow but in a more positive manner - I just realized that it really hurts to loose someone I love, and that I'm gonna miss him, period... now it's time to move forward, to follow through, so I just examined my schedule, reassessed my goals and got to the conclusion that my Im schedule has 3 days per week available plus 2- days int the weekends (every saturday and two sundays per month)... The serious trainning will start on october. The rest of the time will be dedicated to family, friends and work (specially work!). After making this a point, I went to the gin and had a bike class - the only thing I could do with the time available. Today I won't train - I'm scheduled for a course and still have things to do at home.
Selected 2 books for this coming next month: Babbit and Howard's End.. this plus The seven Habits of really effective People and Direct Marketing by Bob Stone are supposed to get me really busy for the next 31 days of march... and - hope so - shut up the voices inside my head!
(next post will be only about sports - I promise! - but sometimes people just need to realize that being an IM is about dealing with trainning, personal dellusion, family, friends, study, books, magazines.. blablabla).

PS... just follow this link -http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,1759,1754197,00.asp

I've been reading so many things about ms (have you ever heard about mini microsoft???) that I'm starting to think about working there... who knows!!!!!!??????!!!!!!!

Yesterday was a pretty tough day.. gosh.. so much in my mind... event so, I'm still moving with my schedule - but for now I must take a step forward with my work! I was so anxious that I even got to an astrolgy's website - which surprisingly where right about the moment I'm living (jeez!). If u would like so, just check it out: www.astrologyzone.com.
At night I went to swim but I couldn't deal with the noise made by the voices "screaming" inside my head... after 1000m I quited and decided to take another shot today - I just went to see a counsellor and that worked for me. At home the "message from above" - have you ever heard that God works in mysterious ways"? well, I truly believe it! But you must keep your mind open and stay wide awake... Probably it will sound silly, but I don't mind: getting home I just turned the Tv on and got through onte of these TV series "Medical Investigation"... to redux: a football player just lost his moving ability due to a virus - he got it from milk... the paradox: to eat healthy doesn't mean your eating healthy stuff, but this is not my point - and had to find a new path... the biggest question: how to do it????? The answer: being a warrior... I think this sounds perfect for me: being a warrior... time heals everything (and as the japanese says: everything chances in 70 days, so... let's take a deep breath, focus on what can be done, and let the life flow).

After almost 10 days doing "nothing" (last wednesday I risked a 1:30 bike class) I'm back... mostly due to a broken heart - it's funny how our mind works and how we find strenght in our darkest hours. Saturday I ran 25k in a steady pace and followed it with a 2000 swin... I'm not in my best shape, but I could stand the trainning, so it seems to me a good sign. will see how this week works and I'm assigned for a next long run on march, 5th - which is a day before a 12k run that I'm schedule to do (not very wise I know) - and than I will make up my mind and decide if I'll risk the marathon early in april.. If I feel that I haven't physical conditions I will step back and transfer my first marathon for this year for late june - this one I hope I'll be fit.
Meanwhile I promise myself not to stand alone and cry alnight long as I did yesterday - it won't make me feel better, and won't fix anything. As a friend says: there's no better way to heal a broken heart than a bigger love... my love for now will be just this: my road to Kona.

Sometimes there is no positive thinking or discipline that can take you back on trainning. Friday I took a day off (again) but only because I lost sight of time and couldn't get through the bike class, I thought it could be wise, once I was scheduled to run on saturday morning. Well, as I said: I was. Actually I woke up, but once I had to wit for a friend I just did it.. and that was my sin: he woke up late and when he called me ready to go, it was just to late: my mom's schedule was full for the day and I couldn't go. Well... this is how it works when you have family, friends, job.. a life at all: if you miss you're chedule somethings got to give! And that it was all the weekend: no trainning, no physical activity... at least I could "walk" with my backlog, deal with things that were just there "on the shelf" waiting to be done...
This morning I found n article at the fastcompany.com about saving time... I haven't gone through it, but well... it's on my backlog!
Tonight I won't have plenty of time for trainning, but I'll try an ez run or at least a weight lift session... Wne to work thinking: maybe I should schedule for the IM in 2006, so I won't loose sight of my sports plans, even running through a busy (which I love) schedule.

PS.. very interested about oriental cultura (maybe due the reading of Made in Japan).. have you ever thought about IM Japan??? just follow the link: www.ironmanjapan.com

PS2: it seems to be an interesting book: House of lies - how management consultants steal your watch than tell you the time, by Martin Kihn

Once and again, yestareday i went hope dealing with sore ears... it was awful... but first I had to go to my thursday class... I was wondering what to do about my trainning, upset with the pain and feeling blue... In a matter of fact I was ready to publish an entire blog on swimmers ears. Needless to say this is an important matter, and don't fool yourself: the old rule "no pain, no gain" doesn't apply. And there I was, wondering what to do, when I just got to a friend of mine's blog. It was just so full of excitment... he was talking about his trainning (he is already enrolled for an IM this yr) and this just caught me: the passion.. I just forgot my ears aching, and after class I went to the gin for a weight lift session (what was all I can do due to the time available) and felt great... the pain is still here and I'm scheduled to some research about swimmers ears and on, but for now this all I can take: an extra motivation provided by someone really satisfied with his trainning regimen. As I have read before: enthusiasm begets enthusiasm.


And talking about reading - an interesting article from the Economist about blogging... (and Microsoft, of course...)

http://www.economist.com/people/displayStory.cfm?story_id=3644293

For the first time in almost 5 years I was feverish... I couldn´t believe - I mean, I should be more healthy now, I'm not trainning that hard (actually the last few days was only about ez bike and ez run), I'm eating well... My ears are aching (what made me suspect that the swimmming pool isn't "that clean" as it should)...
After the stress of last week's "ain't got time for more assignements" I wasn't so productive as I should and that made me quite frustrated... I'm down on my list and yesterday I quited my trainning, went home, took an aspirin (also the first in several years) and just went to bed... Today I have class and althought I'm not feelling in my best shape I'm palnning to go to the gin for a weight lift session (at least).. I would like to swim, but I'm not sure it will work - my ears are still aching.
All that made me wonder: does anxiety has something to do about it?

In the news: The fall of the "big woman"

http://online.wsj.com/article_email/0,,SB110795431536149934-INjfYNplal4npunbXSGa66Fm4,00.html

now the big bet: who will be HP's next CEO?????

And for those whom believe that being healthy is a matter of what you eat, there is:

http://outside.away.com/outside/features/200501/guide-to-food_1.html

We always says that we would like to have more time... and there are people (including me) that says that really busy people has time to everything (or in short: if you want something to be done, ask someone really busy)... well.. I do really believe it and live be it... but yesterday I found myself into a real dilemma which made me wonder about the true meaning of time. To balance family, work, sports, personal improvement, friends, books, blablabla is a huge challenge, nobody doubts it, and the day will still remain 24 hrs, no matter what. These are the facts. I've beeen managing to sleep 4hrs per day, avoid wasting time with frivolous things, still watching TV while cleanning the house, reading plus knitting, studying while listenning to the news and so on... and still have to find time to bike, run and swim... ok... but suddenly I have to fit another appointment into my shedule and I just didn't find where.. really... I just couldn't believe it was possible but it happened, so this weekend I have to figure out how to cut something... reduce the time trainning? do not study for the mastership? do not see my friends? do not go to the church? all these things seems equally important... and there are the things just cannot be cut: family, personal care, the dogs... jeez! I was considering sleeping less, but I'm wide aware that I'm in the limit... any hints?????

Talking about time.. only because it's wide used as an excluse, two interesting articles about charity (both worth reading) -
Bill Gates's bid to cure the world (inside the Economist 02/29)
Montreal Gazette - canada.com network (also in Seth's Godin blog)

if a bike a day, run another, then swin on the other one, will I get to Kona?
hummmmmmmmmm

Working 12+hrs a day made me wonder if I should buy an indoor bike trainner... I never really wanted one, I ratter go to the gin and have a bike class, but it ain't working for me anymore: classes are full and time is short... Yesterday I had exactly one hour to train and that made me drive to the gin (you must be asking why I just didn't pick up my sneakers and ran along the streets, but I have one word for you: shower!) in order to try a bike class... It was completely, totally full, so the only thing I could do was a half an hour run in the treadmill... maybe it was beter - I hadn't sleept for a single moment on sunday so...
Today, the rain is falling outside what made me reassess my plans and I will try another bike class then follow it with a swim (not more than 2000 meters)...
Yestarday night I read a chapter from the book Hardball, I didn't get why the rants against it... maybe I'm just too agressive, or maybe the book gets worse along the chapters...
gosh, my backlog is still so big!